For both of my kids, their mom and I kept a “baby book”. It has memories from their first few weeks and months, dates of milestones like crawling, walking, first words, etc. And lots of photos and other cute stuff. The books we used were pre-made with prompts. One of the prompts for each kid was to write a letter for the kids to read later. For Forest, I really struggled with it, and put it off several times, finally writing one around the time he turned 1. For Riley, I did it earlier. I never put the letters in the book because no matter how hard I tried, they kept coming out really pessimistic. That’s part of why I delayed Forest’s for so long. I was worried that their mom wouldn’t like the letters and that other family members may be put off by them. But I think it’s important to publish them, so I’ll do it here in my own space.

Forest’s Letter

Dear Forest,

Your first Birthday party is this Saturday. In this past year I’ve gotten to know you a lot. I’ve seen you grow and learn. Smile, cry, screech, eat, play, snuggle, sleep, and poop yourself.

In the moment some of that is fun and some is hard.

I see you learning and copying all kinds of things. For better or worse, a lot of the things you learn will come from me, especially early on. I’ll do my best to teach you what’s right, but I won’t be perfect. I encourage you to find a wide variety of friends and co-humans to learn from and teach.

Apart from my own imperfection as a role model, there is also the subjective cultural nature of what is right or best to begin with. You’ll learn what I think that is and what your mom thinks it is, and you’ll see that sometimes it changes or your understanding of it changes. That’s hard to accept sometimes. But it’s okay. I’ll always support you in finding your own morals.

That won’t be easy kiddo. It never has been. For hundreds of thousands of years humans have struggled with what right is and why it matters and whether it matters. There have been many different answers and even many different consensuses reached. No reason to expect that will get easier.

In fact, it will likely get harder. You’re inheriting the Earth at a time when the human population approaches 8 billion. I strongly suspect we are over carrying capacity even with significant lifestyle changes. Deforestation and pollution of our drinking water and air supplies are worse than ever (and getting worse faster than ever; but you probably won’t learn calculus for a few more years). I’ve tried hard to combat this. I will continue to try. I’ve also failed, repeatedly, by driving a car when I could have walked, running the heat when it was only somewhat cold, and countless other transgressions. It is hard.

I struggle to maintain hope that your generation will solve these problems, or better yet, adopt a less exploitive morality. I don’t know if it’s possible. Perhaps in your lifetime society will crumble. In this case, my biggest hope is that the shedding of most or all of our human society will represent a getting-back-in-shape for mother Earth. Perhaps it will be the next Noah’s Ark. I hope you make it on the Ark kiddo.

It’s been challenging and exciting to get to know you this past year Forest. I look forward to more time together however much we may have.

I’ll occasionally give you advice. Some of it will be bad. I’ll try my best, but believe it or not, I’m still trying to figure out this whole “life” thing myself.

Riley’s Letter

Welcome to Earth, Riley.

It isn’t that great of a place, tbh. We’ve cut down most of the trees and filled the ocean with plastic. With a population about to blow past 8 billion, we, human kind, are a parasite here. And most of us are ass holes.

Nonetheless, we bring you here with love, and I’ll do my best for you.

I hope you find some joy here and spread some too.

Love dad.

3 November 2023